These Days

I just want someone who wants to hang out all the time, and thinks I’m the best person in the world, and wants to have sex with only me. And it makes me feel very stupid, to tell you this, because it makes me sound like a girl, who wants to like, ‘go to brunch.’ And I really don’t wanna go to brunch. And I don’t want you to, like, sit on the couch while I shop, or, like, even meet my friends. I don’t even want that, okay?

But I also don’t want to share a sex partner with a girl who seems to have asked for a picture of your dick. And also, I don’t want a picture of your dick, because I live very near you, so if you wanted me to look at your dick, I could just come over, and look at your dick. And, I don’t really see you hearing me. And I don’t really see you changing, so. I just summed it up… for you.

And, I’m sorry that I didn’t figure it out sooner. And you must think I’m even stupider than you thought I was already. But, consider it a testament to your charms, because you might not know this, but you are very, very charming. And I really care about you. And I don’t want to anymore, because it feels too shitty for me. So I’m gonna leave…